If I can pin point a single thing in my life that has impacted me more than any other, I wouldn't hesitate to answer “motherhood”.  It is by far the best thing that has ever happened to me… although perhaps not the best thing that has ever happened to my body!

I have always been fit and within my healthy weight zone, however, my weight has fluctuated as much as 15-20lbs within that “normal” range.  That said, I gained 70lbs with each of my pregnancies!  I do confess that with my first, I did eat a lot of cheese and drank a lot of apple juice but definitely not with my second.  My son was in day care when I was pregnant with my daughter and he brought home every virus under the sun, including gastro, which I of course caught.  Feeling unwell more often than not, I did not over-indulge, but still managed to gain 70lbs.  The worst part was that my daughter was born at 4lbs 2ozs so I couldn't even say it was due to a big baby! 

The good news…  I lost all of the weight both times (it took 5 months with my son and 7 months with my daughter – a feat at ages 36 and 38 respectively), I had no stretch marks and I could fit into my pre-pregnancy clothes.  The bad news… things just didn't go back the way they were supposed to! 

I know I'm not alone because the majority of moms I speak with feel the same way.  I know it's really not uncommon these days to get a boob job or a tummy tuck once you're done having children.  In a perfect world, I would probably sign up for it BUT I have a real moral dilemma, never mind the pain and financial investment involved.  Why shouldn't the changes our bodies endure to bring new life into this world be praised for the miracle they have created?  Instead, they are condemned for their new shape!  How horrible is it that we are so hard on ourselves?  Look what we've done – we are women, we are mothers – and the fact that we are able to be both is outstanding!!!  And then there are our daughters… what kind of message are we sending them about “beauty” if we don't believe our bodies are beautiful after pregnancy?

With the expectations set forth by the media on what is considered “beautiful”, as well as the celebrity moms who bounce back and are bikini ready within weeks of giving birth, we are constantly setting ourselves up not only with unrealistic standards, but also for failure.  We may know at some level that this is not the way it should be, but we can't help but give in on another level.

It seems like such a shame that as women, as mothers, we can't support each other enough to overcome these pressures and embrace the changes as the badge of achievement they are.  We should be proud of what our bodies can do.  But why oh why is that so hard to do???

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